Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Beware: Awesome Picture Ahead

Two posts in one day? NO! :) I know, so unlike me lately, but you know what, it feels good to want to write, so I'm going with it.

Because I have pain meds in my system, typing is....uh...a little more difficult than usual. It's taken nearly two hours for me to focus enough to type this much. HA!

In a nutshell, my appointment today went well. My WBC is up slightly to 1.1 and my ANC is a more comfortable 600, all of my other numbers are great which is all terribly boring compared to what I'm going to show you now. For the faint of heart reader, turn back now.  There isn't anything awfully important after this sentence, just awfully awesome.

That is a hunk of my hip bone. (dramatic pause for reaction). More specifically, my husband holding a hunk of my hipbone in a little plastic container. Believe me when I say that this hunk was actually much larger in person, it is on it's side in the picture (which I begged P to take). After Dr. Porter expertly extracted this from my body, he asked if I wanted to see it (um, how WELL YOU KNOW ME SIR!!!). Bitch was huge. There were, as always, many vials of marrow taken. Gross as it may be to some, this (seeing these things) is the only part of this stupid procedure that I kind of enjoy. How cool is it to see your own bone and marrow in a non-trauma situation? Pretty effing cool.

Of the many, many bone marrow biopsies I have had over the last two years, this was the FIRST biopsy where P was invited or allowed to stay in the room. If you have never had or seen a BMB (lucky you), they are, without a doubt, bloody horrible. They are craptastic to feel and I can only imagine craptastic to watch happen to someone you love. P wanted to stay and see this one and, if he's OK with that, I'm OK with that. He was totally into the whole thing, saying later that it was 'so interesting to see in person'. Thanks babe:).

In addition, of the many many bone marrow biopsies I have had over the last two years, I have learned that (much like phlebotomists) there are those that are gifted in these things and those that are....fucking horrible. Dr. Porter is, without a doubt, one of those gifted individuals. There are parts of the procedure that are inevitably painful- usually when the needle pierces the bone (you can't numb bone- this is the moment when you can actually FEEL the shape of your entire pelvis) and when the marrow is extracted (a very long and painful 10 seconds of sucking into a large syringe- feels exactly like it sounds) and the bone shard removal (do I need to explain that one?). All of the other parts- lidocaine administration, piercing the skin with the needle, removal of the needle- when done by some, SUCK. I was impressed by Dr. Porter's skill today, way to go doc!

We'll some of the results by next Friday and then, at the beginning of March, will be heading down to Houston for my 6 month (can you believe it?!?!) check up. I am...curious, stressed, anxious...about the results of this biopsy. Survivor's fear, maybe? Who knows. All I know is that right now, my hip is still achy.

Much love, friends. Please know that every day I am reminded of the exceptional group of people P and I call friends and family. These days are hard, lonely, scary. Thank you for showing me that I am not alone.


  1. You amaze me love,
    Keep truckin'.

    love and light,

  2. B.!! Thank you:) I've been trying to find your blog again girl and it has gone hiding. Did you take it down (that would be a DAMN SHAME)?



  3. Helloooo!!!! from chilly ass Chicago. Have been thinking of you a ton over the last few days and sending you lots of juju. Sorry for the phone tag. I'm taking you with me in my heart/mind to Costa Rica, so I hope you are ready for some kickin asana and sunshine. Much love to you Laura!!! XOXO

  4. oh, man. this one .... this post.... yikes. but i'm figuring, if my friend can experience this first hand, i can certainly read and understand it all. wow. have i mentioned lately you're probably the bravest chick i know?